Why Are So Many Successful Black Women Single? Lets take a look!
Forty-two percent of U.S. black women have never been married, double the number of white women who’ve never tied the knot.
For starters, there are 1.8 million more black women than black men. So even if every black man in America married a black woman today, one out of 12 black women still wouldn’t make it down the aisle if they hoped to marry a black man.
Let’s take 100 black men. By the time you eliminate those without a high school diploma (21 percent), the unemployed (17 percent) and those ages 25-34 who are incarcerated (8 percent), you have only half of black men, 54 percent, whom many black women find acceptable.
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I think that black women are single and are going to continue to be single because of a lack of character, both within themselves and black men. I am a black man who has lived in europe aswell as africa and everything we as blacks do to one another is counter-productive. As sad as interracial relationships look (and feel)they will continue to rise because blacks are to wise when dealing with each other.
Black women start accommodating (sensible, normal, avg income earning, avg height, and good guy aura) black men that you will love for his inefficiencies, and he will most likely reciprocate that treatment back to you. If you are only polite and sweet with white men, and hard on the brothas what other results do you expect(if you desire to settle down with a black man). Let him know you need him (emotionally) and he will up his game. Also, be aggressive in a discreet way, show him you are worth your salt and fight your man (not physically), most brothas will find this very sexy. Most of us do not feel needed, so we take a cavalier approach to y’all. White women for instance make whom ever they are with (in some cases) feel appreciated and wanted.
So, if your strategy aint working (which it clearly is not)change it up.
This is an age old argument but you know this, every black men deep down wants a black women, but its because of too much “BLACK SASS” that breaks the deal. Think about it, and keep the faith!
P.S. Black men, you guys have to also start handling your business, AND ONE WOMAN. It really only takes two.
As a 54 year old black man, I can only speak from my own experiences. I believe many young professional black women have missed the overall picture. Black men, need to feel needed. If a woman is the bread winner, makes most of the decisions, and is quick to tell a man that she can do bad all by herself, then a man will feel unnecessary and not needed. I do international business and have dated professional women. One was a dentist, the other a chemical engineer, both are now in their 40’s and still hoping to get married. In my travels, I met a beautiful under 35 year old south african lady who is not a professional, but knows how to be a wife. Many woman know how to make and manage their finances, but when it comes to knowing how to be a wife, they are lost. BTW, I do plan to marry the young lady from SA. I’m sure many of those single women have been told that they are too confrontational by a black man. I think it will get worse before it gets any better. Take a look at the women a lot of these celebrities date and marry. Many don’t have the same level of education many professional black women have but look at their lives. Kobe, Jordan, Barkely, Tiger, Simmons, Poitier, the Tabo guy, Chappell and many others could have found a professional black woman, but why didn’t they. Please don’t think it’s all about money either, because on the flip side, Oprah does not have enough money for me to even consider marrying her. What part does society play in how black people look at each other when it comes to who we date and marry?
I think the reason why we are having this debate is fear, and when you have people saying they don’t need one another, then something is wrong, how did we all arrive in this world and make the world go round, because we do need one another. When will the black man and woman stop fighting each other, that’s what the problem is, otherwise those that are professionals, wouldn’t be battling for overall control and work together for the common good of the relationship and the community, because the young are watching and copy every move. Love has no colour, and if a brother wants any woman, as long as they love each other, there is no problem with that, love is unconditional, yet I feel that we have become too materialistic, and instead of reforming character, we generalise and put down women and men, who are trying to be different. Also the homes are not what we think they are, so there’s another pattern developing there. Money don’t love no one, when you die, it looks for someone else to spend them, remember that, and then both black males and females will learn that love is the key.
How come we never hear about White people or any other race not marrying within there race? I refuse to think that black women are the only ones who have a issue that causes successful Black men to not want to marry them. I think the reason why so many successful black women aren’t married is because there afraid to date someone of another race. They feel like they will be letting there race down. “Love knows no color” trust me there are plenty of white, Spanish, Asian, Indian,Italian, etc….. out here that would love a sistah. The first thing black men want to preach about is the “Black Womans Attitude” that turns them off. Might i add there mothers probably had the same attitude when they were growing up and they didn’t have a problem with it. Thats a pretty lame excuse that needs to stop being used.
It’s said what Im hearing from our black men; speaking as if black women are the problem. I am a black women married to a beautiful chocolate man and wouldn’t have it any other way. We have been married for 15 years. We’ve had this discussion about black love; or lack of and have come to three conclusions. First, their are two problems, black men and black women. Brothers aren’t living up to their societal responsibilities. Look in any black neighborhood, hell check out your families (brothas). Too many black men are abandoning babies left and right. Also, from what I can see our women have been trained since the beginning of time to support ourselves, hence the number of single parent homes with women as head of household. You don’t see white men maken babies in record numbers and failing to care for them. It’s said blacks have no sense of family. The other problem is our women, because we don’t trust our men (with good reason) we don’t know how to open our hearts to a man. Trust me it took me a while to grasp what a good man represents, because I had no good male role model to compare. Ladies, sometimes you have to do what I did and let your guard down. Give a brotha a chance, because love takes work, therefore, it will take time to find the right one, but broaden your horizons. MR. RIGHT may not be the black man you seek. Brothas don’t seem to have a problem jumping ship when they make some money, so you shouldn’t have to settle and wait for your black man to come along. Until then, you keep being strong for your families, no one else is.
P.S. Brothas need to recognize that the grass isn’t always greener on the other side. Just look at Tiger Woods situation. His wife hasn’t wasted one minute bailing on him and who’s got his back? That’s just a rhetorical!
Sick and tired of hearing black women get put down by black men…”Too much attitude”, “doesn’t know how to be a wife”…BS…I know a lot of black women with no attitude. I think we have started seeing ourselves through the eyes of the ‘majority’ and it’s just disgusting. I agree that we as black women need to broaden our horizons or “excercise our options” as Chris Rock put it because black men are doing so with no qualms. In fact, some even don’t date black women. So, mathematically it just won’t add up if black women refuse to date outside their race.
First of all….every time you read something about Black women is negative, but still you have other races trying to imitate us and get like us…so, something is wrong with that picture……
Most Black women have a lot class and will not stoop low and do immorally things like other races of women for a “Buck”…..you see other races can go nude on TV, make Sextapes, get drunk, use drugs and still work and get endorsements……..but society hold Black women in a different light and rules…you see….Black women (according to society) can’t make mistakes or they will be punish severely…..and one other reason Black women are not marring is because they are not going to put up with Trashy men (rich or poor)….with major issues……White, Asian, and other races will put up with the MADNESS and collect at the end…….lastly, Black men have been brain washed to go against and belittle Black women….and hold other races on a pedestal….and they get “Burnt” all the time with these women…some of them even loose their career, loose lots of money and sometimes their lives messing with these “TRASHY-Low-Class” white women…and Black men keep going back for more……making a fool out of themselves and loosing their women to other races of men…….Most Black women I know are married to other races of men…because Some of the Black men have major issues, and are cruel …and nice to other women……..so we go else where….Society are always trying to put Black women down…but then they are constantly trying to be like black women….they get injection in their lips, hips, and they go tan their skin, Perm their hair, they try to imitate Black women swag and talk…so it seem to me that their some jealousy here…….
Tammy…it is sad….Black men have been Brain washed…and they are paying a BIG price for going with these White women….you see…Black men want their cake and eat it too….they want to go BUCK WILD and expect Black women to “Go alone with this”…White, Asian, and non-Black women will go alone with this…and they have become use to going Buck Wild and having their cake and eating it too…so they complain about Black women as if something is wrong with us……it’s not US…it’s THEM wanting to have their way, Run Wild, Be on the DL, have 12 baby mommas, and expecting the woman not to complain….other races don’t complain….Black women will “Make you pack you bags, show you the door, change the lock and curse you out”…….
thank you black women! most of them(black men) think when they become famous that they have to have a white or asian or latina on their arm to go with the flo, u know, to look good. they always get burned too. they are sick men and they hate themselves cuz they are black or mixed, after all this time they still dont get it! they think they are too good for a black woman to be on their arm! yes! you all think that u are getting better with them dont u? yes u do! arogant pricks is what they are! and I wouldnt give them the pleasure of me looking at them! and i am a white woman and i am not blind! black women u go girl because u are far better than them that do that!
I think that there has been an overall breakdown between black men and black women: EUROPEAN CULTURE!! We base our standards on so many diverse things that we have trouble meeting a common ground. Our mothers and fathers made us and raised us out of love. Not about how much money we made–or our credit score. I love sisters that’s the only way to go for me!! We have to keep the faith we each other.